This week my 15 year old daughter told me she needed an assistant.
Really? An assistant? I mean, yes she is a busy kid with sports, church, 4H and homework to fit into the few hours of daylight between the last school bell and the 5:45 am alarm. But I can’t see agreeing to a staff position.
She explained that the assistant would keep track of all the things she needed to do and keep her motivated to complete unfinished tasks. There is so much she wants to do, but just no idea about how to get them done.
I understood that feeling. Too many projects, all of equal priority, and a need to do it all.
Figuring how to fit everything in to your life and still be happy is a trick that all women must learn. A rite of passage we do not celebrate but should.
And then, my usually disorganized teen surprised me. She had made a list. An actual written list of these projects and things that she wanted to accomplish.
Was that a tear stinging my eye?
In that moment, I was a very proud momma. She had been listening. Even with the headphones surgically attached to her ears, something had made it through. She picked up on the teachings of our tribe.
We talked about her list and how to take her “To Do” list to the next level. Think about the step you have to take in order to reach the goal.
I was thinking about her fourth grade Science Project assignment sheet. Her teacher had broken the Science Fair process into steps, about 30 of them as I recall, and kids tackled the steps one at a time. While 30 steps may seem daunting to a 9 year old, the breakdown was really straightforward and manageable.
Any project you want to tackle can be broken down the same way. Think about the steps involved, don’t get too far ahead of yourself. No need to panic about how you will present data before deciding on a topic.
We picked one of her goals – reconnect with old friends – and talked about a few of the steps she needed to take. Decide on a couple of people to find, search for their phone number, ask mom (me) if we have an old email address to use. She has already searched Facebook, of course.
Summer vacation starts in less than a month and she will have time on her hands to attack the list. She is growing up fast and soon the To Do list will include selecting colleges and picking a major.
It is nice to know that she is grasping the basics of building a full and happy life.
This post was originally published on WorkingMother.com on May 5, 2011.